Dakarai Molokomme, a 15-year-old starving child from a small village in Zimbabwe, has just told Madonna, one of the most famous pop stars in the world, to go and f*** herself, the local media are reporting exclusively.
“Yes, it’s true, I told Madonna to go f*** herself. Do you want to know why?” Dakarai asked. “It’s the same thing every time with these snobby rich Americans. Every once in a while they come to show us their support for the so-called eradication of poverty by adopting a child from a starving family, but they actually do more harm than good. Transracial international adoptions are part of the white savior industrial complex,” Dakarai explained.
In further discussions with journalists from the media, the kid stated that “none of the children here actually want to be taken away from their family and friends so they can be displayed as some kind of trophy in the homes of self-righteous singers or actors who want to score some points with the media and Oprah.”
“If they really want to help us, they should get Big Pharma to ship us some anti-retroviral drugs for the AIDS epidemic, or build schools and hospitals. If they don’t want to do that, then they can all go f** themselves!” the child told reporters.
The 15-year-old also stated that he would say the same thing to any one of those American or European “faux humanitarian posers”, except for Bono, whom he said he would also kick in the groin.
“Bono’s efforts to save the African savage from itself prove that the colonial imperative is alive and well,” Dakarai said as he walked with other village children collecting sticks to build a tree fort.
THIS IS THE RAWEST 15 YEAR OLD ALIVE
so you should go to this website here and put in the date of your birthday
(mine’s national chocolate cupcake day!!)
IM RICE PUDDONG EWWWWWWWWEEEEWWWEEEEWW
I’m guacamole I’m so disgusted right now what the heck
Nutella Day apparently. OMG.Apple Pie
hot fudge sundae day fuck ye
FUCKING DOG BISCUIT APPRECIATION DAY
Pecan cookie day
I need to have as much wild sex as possible so one day I can become an inappropriate old lady that blurts out things like “when I was your age I got a concussion after being bent over a desk” and then my family can be like “grandma please, you’re making easter dinner really uncomfortable” and it’ll be great
things that should not concern u:
- the length of a woman’s skirt
- the tightness of a woman’s top
- how many people a woman has slept with
things that should concern u:
- america’s gun laws
- that u haven’t petted enough dogs today
- harry potter named a kid albus severus
can a dinosaur even get more fuckin rad?
you bet jurassican
i am so impressed by that dinosaur and that pun congratulations
I got that comic con, comic con sadness
the sound of teenage girls laughing near you when you’re by yourself is literally the most terrifying thing a person can experience
i fell in love with the girl at the rock show
she said “what”
and i said “whAT”
and she said “i can’t hEAR YOU THE MUSIC’S TOO LOUD”
and i said “WHAT”
"no homo" the teenage boy whispers as he pulls away from kissing his friend. he gently strokes the other males face "full bi" he adds in a sensuous tone.
can that be abbreviated FBI?
female privilege is feeling unsafe literally everywhere you go and men getting personally offended by you feeling unsafe
it bothers me that Kansas and Arkansas are not pronounced the same
I’m from the UK and I have been pronouncing Arkansas as Ar-Kansas my whole life
For all my non-american friends, Arkansas is pronounced ark-an-saw
Don’t ask us why, we don’t know either.